Oh, religion.

Sadly the day has come and gone and I'm still pregnant. It's sort of a weird feeling just waiting for the day to meet Evie. Hopefully that day arrives soon and we'll be holding her in our arms.

On another note.


Religion. I know, I know, a very touchy subject but this has been on my blogging list for a while and I've decided to tackle it. Probably because my in-laws are coming to town this weekend and don't like that my husband and I are Catholic. They have always avoided going to church with us somehow when they visit, normally by having to "get going" before church starts. This trip though things are a little different. We are now 5 to 6 hours away instead of 8 so leaving an hour later isn't going to cause a problem.


See, here is my take on religion: it should be a choice. I will never ever tell you what to believe or treat you different if your beliefs are different then mine. I will never make you feel uncomfortable in my presence because of our differences and I would expect the same respect. I believe that you can't be forced to believe in something just because your parents think it's right. Religion is something that you have to decide, heart, mind and soul that you want in your life, otherwise your not truly believing.


Here's my point: My husband was forced to go to church. He often tells me that because he didn't know any different he thought that everyone went to church three to four times a week. As a teenager he started to rebel and live a life a little different then his family, mostly his parents. Once in college he did a 180 and didn't act "Christian-like" at all. He did things that would make his parents die if they knew and lost who he was. He often tells me that he always felt that when he went back home he wasn't "good-enough" or was being judged by both his family and church community. After college he stayed on quite a destructive path for a while. Until we met Bill was into drugs, sex and drinking. His life was anything but what his parents assumed it would be when he was that little boy in church. He was on a path to self-destruction. I didn't change my husband but when he met me, he changed. He had stopped doing drugs, quit sleeping around and although he still drinks it's not a problem anymore. He decided that he had something to quit for, me.


After we started dating we decided we needed to find a church home together. I was driving clear across the Twin Cities to go to my home church and it seemed a little crazy. We found a church we thought we would both like, New Hope Free Church. It was upbeat and mostly younger adults. We got connected but I wasn't getting much out of it. It seemed more like a performace to me then church. I was used to my Catholic rituals and traditions. I expressed this to Billy and he told me he'd try it out. It took a few times but he started to feel involved.


Billy started going to classes once we found out we were pregnant with Addison to become Catholic. I never asked him too, I never pressured him. One day he came to me and told me that he thought it was important that we believed in the same things and went to the same church. Since it was more important to me to stay Catholic then it was to him to not be a Catholic, he called the church and set up his first class. I was proud, humbled and honored that my husband would do this for me. Since he has become Catholic his faith has changed. He asks so many more questions, is interested in the reasons why Catholics do things and seems to have a relationship with God again. It was his choice to find religion again and it's better then ever before. Funny how that works, eh?


As for the way I will raise my children, of course, right now, Addison is forced to go to church with us, she is after all 17 months old. She will continue to go to church with us every week until she is old enough to make an educated decision on her beliefs. If she decides that this isn't the path for her she is going to have to have an educated discussion with Billy and I about her reasoning's. But, if it's just not that she doesn't want to get up on a Sunday I'll hear her out. It will be hard to let her walk away. But I know in my heart of hearts that she would at somepoint in her life, come back. I think thats the awesome thing about letting people make their own decisions. I fear that if I force her to go to church or believe in what I believe in she, too, will rebel against God.


I'm pretty open-minded about religion and church. I know that my relationship with God is personal and only He and I understand it. I don't like being questioned about my "faith story" or why I believe in God. See, I'll tell you all the wonderful things he's placed in my life but the relationship I share with Him is just with Him. Your relationship will be different. That's the amazing thing about God: He meets you where you are. His relationship is different with everyone and that's what makes it so awesome. I could go on and on about the religion. About how not all Christians are judgemental jerks, how in the end I truly believe that we are all praying to the same God in Heaven but I just don't have the time tonight. Instead, I'll end with this: Oh, religion.