First Impressions

Thoughts for the day:



First impressions are lasting impressions.



I remember hearing those words so many times in school. And, I suppose, to an extent, it's true. I remember the first time I met most of the important people in my life. My husband, my friends: Tori, Karen, Dor, and my sister-in-law, Vicki. I remember my first thoughts and my first feelings. It's a good thing I took a little time to look beyond those all important first impressions.



I met my husband at a bar. We were drinking. He seemed cool. On our second date I met him at his house. He walked out and was wearing, no kidding, a green zip-up Puma athletic jacket, a matching green belt and you've got it, a green pair of Puma shoes. I just kept thinking, SERIOUSLY?! But, I went out with him that night. We went to Lake Calhoun, sat on a blanket, watched the sun go down and drank a bottle of wine. He was funny and sweet. Beyond his terrible choice in clothing that night, this guy was great. I'm glad I let my first impression go.



I often think about the first impression I give off to people who don't know me. See, I am super awkward in large social settings. I know that seems hard to believe for people who've known me all my life but I've changed a lot since cancer. I just awkwardly sit in the back round and take it all in. I've learned, from a good friend, that her first impression of me was not good. She bluntly told me, "I totally thought you were a bitch". I get that. Girl in the corner, watching, evaluating, not participating. After she got to know me better and I opened up a little more she realized that I just don't do well with people I don't know. But it makes me wonder, how many people have had that first impression of me and not looked beyond it?



I know I've done that. I've judged someone off of my first impressions and left it at that. What's worse is that I've judged someone off of another person's first impression. I've let someone tell me whether or not I like someone. It seems irrational when I say it out loud but I know I've done it. It makes me wonder how many friendships I've past up because I thought the person looked a certain way. It's ridiculous.



I think as an adult it's our job to let first impressions go and get to know the person on the inside. I've realized that I might be surprised with the friendships that are formed when I take a little time to know the real person. I mean, how much can we really learn from an outward appearance. I remember another saying we learned in school (which contradicts the first statement):



You can't judge a book by it's cover.