Marriage is just like childbirth

Monday marks Billy and my second wedding anniversary. It's hard to believe that in the past two years we've birthed and raised a kid to a healthy 15 months and we are months away from birthing another. We've moved from Minnesota to Iowa. Billy has had two companies lay him off and I've become a stay at home mom. The past two years have brought stress, changes, adjusting, compromising and a lot of prayers.

Our wedding day was probably the second best day of my life. It was a beautiful day for May, hot actually. The sun shown down and the clouds gave us just enough of a break from the heat. The ceremony went without a hitch, except for the deacon mispronouncing our last name and the golf course was beautiful. Our wedding party was fantastic. My sister-in-law was such a trooper, helping me with everything I needed, 8 months pregnant.

It was a party. All our friends and family were there. It was a night filled with celebrating Billy and I joining our life together. It was filled with drinking and dancing. Socializing and singing. My 87 year old grandpa Frank danced all night, even with a bad knee and entertained all of us. The boys from Duluth took turns reminding Billy that if he ever hurt me they'd hurt him. I danced with my dad, my new husband and all my friends. It was, in essence, the start of a beautiful life together.

As most of you know, I got the shock of a lifetime nine days after our wedding day. I was so tired on our honeymoon. I wanted to sleep and Billy was starting to get frustrated with me. I couldn't figure out why I was so tired and didn't even want to share a glass of wine with my husband. When we got home the feeling didn't go away. In fact, at work one day I almost fell asleep coloring a friends hair. I went home that day, took a pregnancy test and to my surprise it was positive. I called Billy and told him and he didn't believe me! He picked up another one on the way home and that one was positive too! Nine months later, okay, eight, we welcomed Addison Grace into our lives.

We've been through a lot these past two years. Billy's been laid off twice and we've moved to Iowa. We've really had to learn how to count on one another for support. It's been harder for me to remember that what my parents think or say doesn't matter, as much, anymore. We have faced bumps in the road. There have been times where one of us wants to give up and leave but we've made a promise to never give up on each other. We're still learning how to fight fair and we're learning how to make up. We've realized that there are somethings you just don't need to say and others that just aren't going to change.

Marriage really is work. It's hard work. No one said it would be easy. It's funny how we think that we love each other so it'll work out. We don't see it for what it really is: two separate people with separate opinions joining their lives, hearts, DNA and money to create one new person. Of course it's hard.

I am glad that two years ago I made the right decision and married my husband. I am excited to see where the next 50 years brings us. I am sure someday I will look back and think it wasn't that hard. Maybe marriage is like childbirth, we forget just how hard it is otherwise, who'd do it.